In the book After the Ecstasy, the Laundry, Jack Kornfield includes a story from a Christian contemplative who had spent many years struggling with despair. He shared his struggles with Father Bede Griffins, a Catholic monk. "We talked and he told me that I had made up a whole story of how the spiritual journey should unfold. Then he held my face in his hands and beamed such love into me and said, 'Why not be your own unique self. That's all God wants from you.'"
Today, instead of second guessing or doubting yourself and your choices, trust that you are on the right track.
In the book After the Ecstasy, the Laundry, Jack Kornfield includes a story from a Christian contemplative who had spent many years struggling with despair. He shared his struggles with Father Bede Griffins, a Catholic monk. "We talked and he told me that I had made up a whole story of how the spiritual journey should unfold. Then he held my face in his hands and beamed such love into me and said, 'Why not be your own unique self. That's all God wants from you.'"
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Today, acknowledge your spiritual wholeness. Although you may imagine that you are fragmented, damaged, lacking, or incomplete, in actuality, you are whole. Throughout the day, remind yourself "I am whole."
Today, when self-critical thoughts aggressively present themselves, be more active in dismissing them. You don't even need to have a conversation with them or present a counter argument. Just dismiss them as firmly and perfunctorily as you would a dishonest salesman at your front door.
When Robert A. Jonas was in his forties and feeling unsettled about his vocation and the next steps in his career, Henri Nouwen gave him this advice:
"You've come a long way in your life, and there is nothing wrong . . . You are focused on your career, but that is not the issue right now. The real question is, 'What is the ultimate goal of your life?' . . . What is most important is who you are. You have to slow down and ask yourself what you really want and what will make you happy and help others to be happy." In his book Discernment, Henri Nouwen writes that the Greek word for patience means "dwelling in the present moment" and requires that we enter "the thick of life." He adds, "When we are impatient, we experience the present moment as empty and want to move away from it. Much of our commercial culture skillfully exploits our impatience and tempts us to move toward 'the real thing,' which is always somewhere else or at some other time. Impatient living is living according to clock time (chronos), which has a merciless objectivity to it. It does not allow for spontaneity or celebration. Patient living is living in the fullness of time (kairos), in the knowledge that real life events happen in this fullness. And the great event of God's appearing is recognized in the fullness of time."
Today, be less concerned about your own life and worries. Do good for others when you can, when it is natural--and not in service of your opinion or ego. Refrain from gossip. Be affectionate and appreciative. Acknowledge the presence and activity of Love in all of our lives. Feel the joy of just being alive.
Henri Nouwen in his book Discernment writes:
"In solitude and meditation the dark and wounded side of us that is still in need of healing often asks for attention and has to be acknowledged just as much as our idealized selves. We all have the deceptive tendency to live selectively, choosing to see only those experiences we can identify with and pushing the rest aside. By bringing the whole self to our attention, we not only claim our dark side but also change our ego ideal, the persons or idealized self that is only part of who we are. In a way, in the stillness we cultivate, we become free to stand as we are before God and transcend our limited view of ourselves. The ego ideal is often made up of self-created expectations and aspirations regarding intelligence, career, physical beauty, moral stature, and so on. The mystery of life, however, is not only that we have a dark side that we want to deny but also that we are better than our ego ideal! Our true identity is found in God, who created us in the divine image." Today, embrace the wounded and pained parts of yourself with kindness and let go of striving for human perfection. From Henri Nouwen's book Discernment:
"The truth is that God loved us before we were born and will love us still after we have died. God molded us in the depths of the earth. God knitted us together in our mothers' wombs. God has inscribed us on the palm of his hand. Every hair on our head is numbered and counted by God. We are held by God in an everlasting embrace. We belong to God from eternity to eternity. Indeed, we are God's daughters and sons. As beloved children, our core identity is secure in the memory of God. Whether or not we do anything worthwhile, prove anything important, or give anything of value, God still loves us unconditionally. It is a strong, vital, and active fatherly and motherly kind of love that holds us safe and affirms our worth, wherever we go and whatever we do." From Henri Nouwen's book Discernment:
"Often in quiet meditation and reflection we discover that we are more than our individual selves and come slowly to realize who we really are. We slowly learn to see, within our own hearts, the reflection of one who breathed life into us. There we come to the remembrance of God, who loved us before we were born and before we could love ourselves or try to prove ourselves worthy of love. The truth about ourselves is that we are more than ourselves, more than we can think or express, more than our physical presence, more than our personality or character." "Becoming the beloved, remembering who we are, is the greatest blessing in our lives." Henri Nouwen is his book Discernment writes,
"When you start believing that [you are the beloved of God], this spiritual knowledge will grow until it transforms daily life. You will still have rejections and you will still have pains and losses, but you will live them no longer as a person searching for his or her identity. You will live them as the beloved. You will live your pain and anguish, your success and failures, as one who knows who you are." |
AuthorTarn Wilson is the author of the memoir The Slow Farm and numerous essays. You may read more of her work at tarnwilson.com. Archives
September 2020
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